Biography '♥ Eyya Seraphiel ![]() Awesome Nineteen ![]() Blissfully attached to '♥Aly Hagaishi My life, my say. I don't pay you to judge. I love the way, I am Spammers, get a life sweets ! |
Monday, April 12, 2010
4/12/2010 05:02:00 PMOnce Upon A Time, Sweet Sacrifice , pure patience , undivided love , trust within , Complete perseverance , Minimal ego , Soft speaking : For a complete true love . Yet again obstacles are coming non stop , but never will i ever back down to give up . Let me be the one most hurt , its okay . I'll still give in . I might be completely hurt and shedding tons tears without a stop , i dont mind . Coz i know im strong and i've promised to be patient and your first strongest love . You can never find love like this . You can never get someone like me . You can never replace me with other girls . Trust me on dhat baby . For the sake of this engagement we made , i dont mind giving in . I treat a relationship/engagement like a marriage . To me , being a wife needs tons of patience and to accept every pains in the marriage/engagement . whatever problem we face , there isnt a need to actually get help from anybody especially outsiders . So we just settle it within us both . Tak sanggup for me as a wifey to actually bukak pekong di dada . Biar pecah di perut jgn pecah di mulot . dhats all i think . How hard or difficult the problem can be , i will never show to people what im facing . I will do anything just to talk to him and settle it together . Be it , im gonna be hurt or anything . Im not gonna get decisions from people coz i know its my own choice to be made . Yesterday , promised to meet at 9.30pm . Waited and waited but he didnt come down . and so , texted his mum and ask abt him . Then it was stated dhat he wasnt at home . So , talked awhile with his mum and i went to look for him . Searched evrywhere but nowhere to be found . Then again , last destination ; lan gaming . I ran from bedok south to bedok interchange with tears rolling down without a stop . Then i went up after smoking and looked for him . Thought i couldnt find him coz he was sitting somewhere very secluded . Saw him and i went to him . I know he didnt expect for me to look for him . I know he was shocked but he couldnt look at me as he felt dhat he have done too many faults to deserve a patient girl like me . Due to mix of emotions , i actually did took out the ring . and told him " if i werent a good gf to you , i'll let you find another . " As i said dhat , nothing could describe my feelings . I was so in pain with what i said . he couldnt fight a thing at all . coz he has nothing to back him up . Coz he has been in fault for evrything . i went down and smoked ; to cool down this feeling of mine . Then while sitting i was completely talking to myself . dar mcm org gyler -,- Just pouring out my feelings . But one part of me is saying his not worth , leave him . but the other is saying , sabar with him . you'll surely get something good in return insya allah . i chose the good part which is to sabar and go thru evrything . I then went up again and sat with him . talking for awhile . though no reponse but im never gonna give up . So i said i wanted to talk to him personally , so he stopped his game and went down with me and we talked . As usual , as a girl , talking and trying to make him laugh and also give him courage and strength to go on with me , i did cried . only then he hugged me and consoled me . He's touch simply made me even more sad . coz i was missing dhat hug , his smile and also his laugh . He wasnt in the mood therefore no laughter , only normal smile and hug i got . alhamdulillah , i manage to try help him . he was confused , dhats all . Fiance , please be strong . Though any kind of pains , im still here for you baby . I know you're confused due to some reasons . but im never gonna say goodbye to this love we had . Though howh much pain i'll get . i dont care . Ihope things can actually try to go well from now on . insya allah . Allah , please give me the strength to go on with this obstacles . talked to fiance just now , things seem to be rather slowed down and more relax . alhamdulillah . |
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